Time Zones and Relationships in Second Life

You know what really sucks? Meeting someone in SL and finding a kindred soul, only to discover that they’re in Australia while you’re on the East Coast of the United States. Not that there’s anything wrong with Aussies—it’s just that it’s awfully hard to maintain a friendship, much less a relationship, because of the time difference.

I had something similar happen to me recently. I made several new friends, but I haven’t seen any of them since then. And that, my friends, is why I urge you to put a note in your profile. In my 1st Life tab, it simply says  EST (SLT +3). EST is Eastern Standard Time, and SLT +3  means that I’m 3 hours ahead of Second Life Time (which is either Pacific Standard or Pacific Daylight Time, depending on the time of year). As Linden Labs are located in California, that’s the default time for the entire SL world.

Some Notes On Your Profile

Your profile is there for a reason. It lets people know a little bit about you. It doesn’t have to be detailed, but at least put something in there! I generally make it a practice to ignore people with empty profiles—especially when they’ve been in SL longer than 6 months.

I’ve even seen empty profiles for people who have been in SL for 7 or 8 years! What that tells me is you’re boring or perhaps too secretive for me to waste any time on you.

As an example, here’s my profile:

It’s pronounced “ash-LEEN.” Yes, it’s Irish. Yes I am…if you go back 4 or 5 generations. And before that, we wuz Scouses.

Harbour Grace, Newfoundland is the ancestral home. See my Picks for more about me.

I am ceann cine (clan chief) of Clan Aisling O’Connor. It’s pronounced “kian kineh.”

And under my Picks:

I’m kinda shy around new people, but I’m happy to join any conversation to which I’m invited. I always answer IMs…so long as they’re not of the “Hi, baby! Wanna fuck?” variety. R and U are letters, not words.

I appreciate people who can form complete sentences and who use proper grammar. What can I say? I’m an English professor in real life.

Those words are accompanied by this picture:


And that’s me in a nutshell. But my profile is a living document: I keep it updated to reflect where I am in SL, in relation to friendships, servitude, relationships, and the like.

Don’t be boring! And if you’re too shy to put anything in your profile, you might want to ask yourself just what the hell you’re in SL for in the first place.

Good Manners in SL

I can’t believe I even have to talk about this, but good manners are just as important in Second Life as they are in real life. Maybe even more, since you can get blocked or even banned from SL.

My Biggest Complaint

People who hang out at the landing place for a sim and never do anything else. They just stand or sit there, not interacting with anyone. Now, you might wonder what’s wrong with this, as nobody would complain about it in real life (IRL). But here’s the deal: there are limitations on the number of avatars that are allowed into a given sim at any one time. And people who just hang out can be keeping other people from entering the sim—other people who wish to partake of the activities there.

Another annoyance is people who frequent sex sims and complain about the behaviors they may see or hear. The RL counterpart of these people are folks who buy houses near the airport and then complain against the noise. Look, it’s like gay marriage: if you don’t like it, don’t have one. Don’t like what goes on in sexually-themed sims? Don’t go there!

Men Can be Such Douchebags

I’m talking about the men (who I suspect are really teenaged boys behind the avatars) who walk around naked and sporting perpetual hard-ons. I mean, really? Do you get away with that IRL? Then what makes you think it’s okay in SL?

Along with that are the male avatars who seem to think that every woman in SL is interested in sex. Some of us are, some aren’t, and some just aren’t interested in sex with men. Some prefer the intimacy of other women, which often happens without necessarily ending in sex.

My Own Approach

Like what I hope is the goal of the majority of other SL residents, I’m here to have fun, to explore new places, and to perhaps discover something about myself in the process. Treat me with respect, and I’ll do the same for you. But be a jerk, and you’ll find out just how quickly I can BLOCK and DERENDER you.

Aisling's Signature" Love, Aisling